(no subject)

[symbioidlj]

bad past couple of days. cried at work. panic attack. fortunately was able to do my job for the most part. didn't leave early or go to the bathroom (to hide).

sick of reality. wanted escape. claustrophobic. don't know why the fuck i didn't pop in radiohead. *sigh*

tonight, I was thinking of writing to my 3rd grade teacher (I oft do so, but never get around to it), and thanking her for encouraging my questioning mind. then i thought: but that's what's causing my problems. i don't just "accept" it. and then i got mad about that. i can't just ignore it all like others do (not you guys, you're smarter than that)... but as i reflected upon this, I realized that I have this moral conviction and rage and yes it saddens me, but how dare some "Christian" lecture me on morality when they support the mass murder known as war. And I can take hope in the fact that this sorrow and anger is a symptom of my conscience, and I should be glad that I can still feel it. If I didn't, I would truly be a dead, evil person inside, and I refuse to let them do that to me. I'm better than that. So hopefully, tomorrow I can start my day with this knowledge, confident and safe in this knowledge that I still feel the right thing, that I know love for my fellow earth-children.

Comments

[vesicular.livejournal.com]

When any religious folk try to lecture me, I just remember that they basically are only doing what their imaginary friend tells them to. If I look at it that way, I can't help but feeling sorry for them.

[trisquareangle.livejournal.com]

*big big hugs*

I'm at the library and I can't remember my new
address (heh) so I will email you guys when I
come back with it. I also mean to call you
but I'm not sure what time is good...not wanting
to call to late and all that jazz so let me know.

would be wonderful to catch up and hear your voice!

peace and just breathe

<3

[symbioid.livejournal.com]

mmmmmmm... that's the sound of me purring. thank you.

any time is a good time. we usually end up not answering until the second set of 3 rings, bastards we are.

Usually I end up going to bed by between 11 and 3 am. anytime before 1 am is probably a good time. I do nap between 6 and 9 or thereabouts, but it's not a problem if you call then. It's all good. And Rosemary is always home so she can talk to you if I'm napping or whatever.

I hope to hear from ya soon. Thanks so much for the hugs. I just needed it again today (not quite as bad)

this time i'm listening to radiohead, so that helps. :)