(no subject)

[symbioidlj]

ok, so here's the deal.

life has been shitty.

but it's ok.

I was completely stressy at work today, came home for lunch instead of eating there, so I had some space to just be. Flipped out a little later when I was at work. Came home. Windows was being a complete bitch, kept locking up. Linux... OK, Ray, you're gonna kill me... I switched back to Mandrake, cuz it just feels more secure. I don't know what it is, but Gentoo just felt very clunky, and I swear things started to slow down after running Gentoo a while(in the same way that windows does, but not quite as bad)... I wanted to install LogJam, and tried to find the RPM's for GTK2.0 libs... finally after a second complete install I found it. The cd drive wasn't working right, and then in a fit, I broke disc 3. I tried to burn the disc 3 iso tonight, but once it didn't work, and the second time it appeared to work, but just didn't burn properly. I decided to just fuck everything(once again), and go back to windows.

linux isn't for me. I tried, I really did.


but here's the clincher. Windows is being a bitch to install. I remember having a mild problem last time trying to get it to install, but now it's not working again. the mouse isn't being detected, and I think I need to get drivers for my network card once more. I need to install win98SE, I think to get the USB ports to work properly(dunno why... bullshit, really), but now it's giving me all these fucking "Not enough conventional memory" errors.

I WANT on Open Source OS that is user-friendly, oriented to the desktop. It CAN'T be linux. This is, I believe, one of the problems with most OpenSource OS's... They all wanna be unix. OK, there are some good things to take from unix, but seriously, it's the year 2003. Unix is 30 years old. Let's try something fresh. I know, OSX uses a BSD core, but then, why can't PC open source people make something as functional and simple as OSX(OK, I admit, I'm making assumptions here), and granted, the mac is a closed architecture, so it's apples to oranges... But I'm just sick and tired of windows feeling like it's gonna collapse all the time, and linux being such a difficult bitch of a whore to use(even though mandrake felt pretty stable, IMO, until all this other shit fucked up)

I need windows, for my fucking games. I could give a rats ass otherwise.

I thought about upgrading to XP, but two things hold me back. 1) closed source and VERY costly. I don't wanna have to pay 200 fucking dollars for a god-damned operating system, especially since I don't have the money. Supposedly, it's much more stable. And hell, it's prettier(not as pretty as OSX, I admit)

2) I wanna program, but I don't wanna have to be tied to using the Windows API, and since apparently XP got rid of the Command Line(what dumb shit is that???), and has no DOS compatibility, then I can't utilize any games I wanna try to program.(I lost PONG now, cuz of my format)

All this reformatting has happened so many times I'm so used to it. Sometimes, I think as much as I love computers, maybe it just try to do tooo many things. Maybe I expect things to work when I try to fiddle with them. Maybe I don't expect ot have to reinstall and delete and wipe out shit all the fucking time.

I see it as some sort of zen thing. Accepting the impermanence of data. Knowing that it is temporary. But still, I suffer. Each and every time, a little piece of me is destroyed. Hours wasted. Hours that were recorded and saved in the form of stories, and songs, and savegames. gone. because I never backed them up when I should have(through linux, cuz there's no fucking free CD burning software out there, apparently, for windows)

I just hate computers. I never thought i'd ever say that. ever. but really, they piss me off. And it shouldn't be like this.

I suppose if I ever got a mac, I'd be even more fucked, cuz I'd wanna fiddle, but I have a feeling it's even more of a bitch to fiddle with.

I should just stop trying to tweak and fiddle, and just run a program, use it for it's purpose, and never ever dare to attempt to push a system beyond anything... Cuz i fuck it up everytime.

i'm just bitter. whatever. good night.

btw, it'll probably be a few days before I can get windows running properly again.

grr....

Comments

[ziggurat.livejournal.com]

MacOSX is a UNIX, and, except for the GUI, it is extremely fiddle-able. it has a command line, an open source kernel/OS architechture, all the config files are XML. hell, you can even download the source code to the kernel, and recompile your own.

also, the Mac uses a low level machine API called OpenFirmware. it is an open architecture, the same used by sun sparc boxen. many of the other machine technologies are also open: PCI, Firewire, USB, Ethernet. so what is closed about the mac architecture? granted, it wasn t always so, there was NuBus instead of PCI, ADB instead of USB, Appletalk instead of ethernet/IP. all closed protocols. but those days are over.

no DOS compatibility, however. if you want to play video games, windows is the only option.

and gentoo: slow? sure the compilation takes a long time, but an optimized compile should run very snappily....

[vesicular.livejournal.com]

It's funny, cuz as I read your post, all I could think about is "You need OS X". Now, you know I'm biased towards Apple, but ever since I got OS X at work, I've just been in love. All that shit you go through w/ Linux isn't there. But yes, the tweaking still is. I mean for Christ, OS X even comes w/ full developer tools for doing programming. I even have X11 installed (from Apple) so I can fuck w/ that stuff. Not to meantion Java built in that rocks. And of course all the BSD shit. And the nice Apple UI. Ok, ok, I sound like a salesman.

The only issue I have w/ Apple, the ONLY issue, is that their shit is expensive. But goddamn, OS X is soooo damn nice. Unfortunately, being in a money crunch myself (and still waiting to see if I get laid off) has stopped me from buying a new Mac. Thus I'm still on OS9 at home. That sucks.

Anyway, Apple doesn't always get it right. But the do a better overall job than anyone else. I think there's a reason why all my super tech-head friends all switched from PC's and Linux to the Mac once they got a taste of OS X. These are the same types of people who would laugh and redicule people for owning a Mac in the past. Now they can't get enough of it.

I just really, really, really, really, wish they were cheaper. But I guess you get what you pay for. I guess what's why I'm saving my pennies.

hmm

[rflagg.livejournal.com]

Hey Dave?

We've got XP professional cracked. It takes some work around with installing the service pack (because Microsoft blocked out some of the activation codes), but you can get around that stuff and get regular updates just fine - Anthony has been running it on his computer since last year sometime. I bought the Home version upgrade quite a while back, too.

XP is very stable, and very nice. Command line is still there, too. (you do mean bringing up a dos window by going to Run... and typing in 'command', right?) Plus, while it usually doesn't work too well, they do have a feature to run programs in older versions of windows - but like I said, it doesn't work very well.

When a crash occurs in XP, you lose a program, not the whole fucking system. Plus, it doesn't happen often enough to bitch (except when you're using buggy software like Cool Edit Pro 2 and you haven't saved, but even then, CEP2 is smart enough to remember the last state, and bring it back).

So, if you want us to hook you up, let us know. It's screwing the MS Man, and it's getting a decent operating system. :)

-m.

[narcissuskisses.livejournal.com]

I agree with Joe. And like the second commenter, I am also biased toward Mac. OS X is great for both types of people: those who want a simple to use, attractive, fast GUI that will support their favorite opensource software, plus all the ol' Mac standbys; and those who want to really mess with things, tweaking, compiling their own kernel, etc.

I don't blame you about your decision with linux (though Ray might!). It is more trouble than it's worth for me as well.

However, for your needs, I'm sorry to say that Windows is probably the way to go. Apple is nice, but more expensive than you could ever justify. You'd be sorry if you ever went in that direction.

Big Mac fix.

[abadman.livejournal.com]

I sounds to me like you do expect too much to just work. It's the whole Big Mac generation bias. We expect things to work without effort and feel that we are being deprived of a right when thing don't just work. It's really silly when you think about it though. Perhaps what you need is an X box or a Sega to take out some idle clicking on. Then you can actually sit back down at your computer and engaged by it instead of using it as the mind-numbing clicky thing.

I know I'm being shitty, but really, there was no perseverance in your effort to escape M$, and half of that was due to expectations of a prepackaged ready to use multi media device, like a VCR, or an Xbox. When you really think about it though, is that what you really want out of your computer? I like that linux challenges and engages me. That's exactly why I use linux.

-ray.

-ray

Re: Big Mac fix.

[symbioid.livejournal.com]

Due to the length of my reply, I actually just posted it into my regular journal, so if you'd like you can read it there... :)